MacGyver and Chuck Norris Crash Land on an Isolated Desert Island…

From the wreckage, they salvage 10 o-rings, 1 roll of safety wire, 6 reducers, and 12 nuts. How do they get off the island?

We asked fearless pilots on possible plans to evacuate Mac and Chuck off the island. SkyGeek fan Jeff Bauer (possible relation to Jack), devised an ingenious plan to save our heroes.

MacGyver dusted the sand out of his disheveled hair and stood on the beach, his legs wobbly and head still swimming from the crash. Before him turquoise waters splashed gently around the lush green uninhabited desert island while behind him the remains of the crash carved an ugly scar into the jungle flora. He turned and surveyed the damage. Few parts of the craft remained and what wasn’t turned to slag from the heat was unrecognizable and unusable.

“Here’s another nice mess you’ve gotten me into,” said a sarcastic voice behind him, “How are we going to get off this island, genius?”

MacGyver turned back towards the beach and saw Chuck Norris strutting up the beach, his hands holding a small cardboard box.

“Maybe if we were Laurel and Hardy we’d consider this a mess. I consider this a challenge. What do you have there?”

“Well, luckily the package of supplies from SkyGeek ejected before we crashed. I was able to run across the water and retrieve it before it sank. They sure packed the hell out of it, luckily.”

MacGyver raised his eyebrows and stuck out his hand. Chuck removed the super adhesive packing tape with a one-finger tae kwon do move and handed over the box, packing peanuts spilling onto the white sand.

“Hmm, let’s see; some O-rings, safety wire, reducers and nuts. Not much to work with,” said MacGyver, pulling out the parts from the box. He paused and looked around the island, looking for inspiration.

“I have confidence in you, Mac. The secret of my success is an overabundance of confidence. It’s gotten me far,” offered Chuck helpfully.

“I’m going to need tree trunks from those palm trees and lots of palms,” said MacGyver, hands waving towards the overabundance of palm trees swaying gently in the cool ocean breeze. Chuck dusted off his hands, nodded and walked purposefully over to the tree line. Soon the air was filled with the sounds of flying side kicks, knife hand chops, karate yells and splintering trees. MacGyver passed the time doodling out his plans in the flat clean sand nearest the water’s edge. A crab sauntered across his sandy workspace, leaving a trail of claw marks on his drawing.

Two hours later they both stood back, admiring their work. Nestled snugly between the boles of two large and supple palm trees stood their flying contraption, a device that even Rube Goldberg would find complex. Each of the long elegant wings was covered in palm leaves, secured to the wooden wing spars with safety wire. Evenly spaced along the length of the wings shiny nuts glistened among the fronds, wire threading them snugly to the bamboo ribs. In the center of the odd-looking craft a clump of bamboo poles lashed together with o-rings formed the lightweight fuselage. In the front, where the wing spar met the fuselage, a tiny joy stick fashioned from green bamboo sat in the middle of a complex array of wire fed through reducers led to primitive ailerons, elevators and a rudder all made from woven coconut shells. The plane sat pointed to the sky at a 30 degree angle, the large palm trees bent over and secured with lashed vines.

MacGyver looked up into the sky. To the east a line of growing cumulonimbus clouds signaled the approach of a storm. The sail plane jostled in its cradle as the winds began to pick up.

“I’ve calculated that if we can get to 2,000 feet right in front of that storm we should be able to pick up thermals and ride them back all the way to the continent and civilization,” said MacGyver, a thin line of sand dribbling from his fingers as he judged the wind direction.

“The only problem is how to we get that high up to start?”

Chuck patted MacGyver on the shoulder. “I got that. Load up.”

MacGyver shrugged and clambered up the palm trees and onto the top of the fuselage, his legs intertwined into the bamboo for support and tested the flight controls one last time with the bamboo joy stick.

Chuck slapped his hands together smartly, the loud clap rivaling the rumbles from the approach storm and rubbed his hands together rapidly. He took a large breath, yelled loudly and simultaneously hand chopped the vines holding the plane on the ground while performing a 360 flying side kick into the trees. His forward momentum, coupled with the released energy from the bent-over trees, propelled the craft and the two extraordinary inhabitants high into the sky. Directly behind them the fringes of the storm caught the plane and buffeted it up into the sky. Below them the lush green island disappeared from view.

“Guess we really are Sky Geeks today,” yelled MacGyver as he expertly flew the sail plane ahead of the storm, buffeting wildly.

“The word ‘geek’ and ‘Chuck Norris’ never go together,” growled Chuck Norris as they sailed into the sunset and towards home.